In the vein of all the other things that make your life choices for you, we present this character concept generator.
A few years ago, the internet was rocked to its very foundations[1] by a wonderful website called What the Fuck Should I Make for Dinner which, uh, does what it says on the tin. Furthering such glories, an enterprising and wondrous transformation has taken place, by which a website will now just spit out ideas for your next Dungeons & Dragons or Pathfinder character as quickly as you declare that you’re dissatisfied with the one it just gave you. Mixing equal parts acutal D&D classes and actual D&D races, with a dash of odd backgrounds and absurd character quirks, Who The Fuck Is My D&D Character gives you everything you need to frustrate and amuse your Dungeon Master and/or fellow players with, for example, an irritable halfling bard from the forest who was raised by wolves.
In our time with it, the generator has produced such wonders as…
-SOPHISTICATED DRAGONBORN ROGUE FROM THE GUARD’S ACADEMY WHO HAS A DRINKING PROBLEM
-CRABBY ELF FIGHTER FROM A ROYAL LINEAGE WHO HAS ALWAYS WANTED TO OPEN THEIR OWN TAVERN
-ANXIOUS HALFLING CLERIC FROM A STRICT MONASTERY WHO MAKES INAPPROPRIATE JOKES AT THE WORST TIMES
-CONDESCENDING HUMAN WIZARD FROM AN UNCHARTABLE ISLAND WHO CAN’T READ
-A PATHETIC ELF SORCERER FROM A BOARDING SCHOOL FOR THE CHILDREN OF MIDDLE-CLASS WIZARDS WHO CAN’T READ
-TALENTED HALF-ORC PALADIN FROM THE CITY POST OFFICE WHO HATES THE MONARCHY
-ATTENTIVE DWARF FIGHTER FROM THE SMALLEST MOUNTAIN IN THE WORLD WHO HAS A BAD GAMBLING PROBLEM
Go ahead, take this piece of absurd creation out for a spin.
The site makes ingenious use of the aptly-named WTFEngine, a tool for making such things, and was assembled by clever twitterer Ryan Grant. Our hats off to Mr. Grant for the handy, amusing site.