In this episode of The Stuff of Legends, Frost tells us the story of a game of Civilization 2 that went on for over a decade.
The 11-Year Civilization Game that Went Out of Control – Transcript
You guys have been so good, the cops were only called on us three times tonight. Let’s have a treat with something a little darker.
Civilization is a game franchise where you can indulge in all sorts of geopolitical altruism and debauchery from the comfort of your own home. Any form of altered history is liable to occur in this world mismanagement simulator. Getting nuked by Mohandas Gandhi is not an exception, it’s the norm. Each match starts with various world leaders with basic tribes in the ancient world. From there, it’s a race to dominate the others through various win conditions, cultural, science, or global domination to name a few. The battle progresses through the distinct eras of history, renaissance, industrial, and usually ends somewhere in the modern age. But one player’s curiosity got the better of him. He let his Civilization 2 game play out bit by bit for over 11 years of real-life time until he lost control of the post-post-post-apocalyptic hellscape and himself with it.
Out of options, Lycerius posted his problem in the reddit gaming forums. He explained that he was a fan of Civilization 2 and had let one game play out for far too long. He wanted to see what the world would look like in the distant future, but it caused him to stalemate into a never ending war that left everything in ruin. He lamented the state of the world and begged for help rebuilding it. I’ve dug up his old journal entries recounting his 10 year struggle. “There are 3 remaining super nations in the year 3991 A.D, each competing for the scant resources left on the planet after dozens of nuclear wars have rendered vast swaths of the world uninhabitable wastelands. The ice caps have melted over 20 times due primarily to the many nuclear wars. As a result, every inch of land in the world that isn’t a mountain is inundated swamp land, useless to farming. Most of which is irradiated anyway.” “As a result, big cities are a thing of the distant past. Roughly 90% of the world’s population (at its peak 2000 years ago) has died either from nuclear annihilation or famine caused by the global warming that has left absolutely zero arable land to farm. Engineers are always busy continuously building roads so that new armies can reach the front lines. Roads that are destroyed the very next turn when the enemy goes. So there isn’t any time to clear swamps or clean up the nuclear fallout. “You’ve heard of the 100 year war? Try the 1700 year war. The three remaining nations have been locked in an eternal death struggle for almost 2000 years. Peace seems to be impossible. Every time a ceasefire is signed, the Vikings will surprise attack me or the Americans the very next turn, often with nuclear weapons. Even when the U.N forces a peace treaty. So I can only assume that peace will come only when they’re wiped out. It is this that perpetuates the war ad infinitum.” “The only governments left are two theocracies and myself, a communist state. I wanted to stay a democracy, but the Senate would always overrule me when I wanted to declare war before the Vikings did. This would delay my attack and render my turn and often my plans useless. And of course the Vikings would then break the ceasefire like clockwork the very next turn. I was forced to do away with democracy roughly a thousand years ago because it was endangering my empire. But of course the people hate me now and every few years since then, there are massive guerrilla uprisings in the heart of my empire that I have to deal with which saps resources from the war effort.” “The military stalemate is air tight…all remaining nations already have all the technologies so there is no advantage. And there are so many units at once on the map that you could lose 20 tanks and not have your lines dented because you have a constant stream moving to the front. This also means that cities are not only tiny towns full of starving people, but that you can never improve them. ‘So you want a granary so you can eat? Sorry; I have to build another tank instead. Maybe next time.’” “My goal for the next few years is to try and end the war and thus use the engineers to clear swamps and fallout so that farming may resume. I want to rebuild the world. But I’m not sure how. If any of you old Civ II players have any advice, I’m listening.” The reddit gaming community were bewildered by the account of the 10 year war. They asked Lycerius to share his game file, and with it they helped him find a resolution to the never ending conflict. One year later, Lycerius returned to the reddit gaming forum and thanked them all for their input. Through their conjoined efforts, the players found different strategies to help him overtake the Vikings and end the Eternal War, but it wasn’t enough anymore. Time had changed Lycerius. All he knew was war. He could no longer live in a world at peace, because a world at peace didn’t need him. The players were shocked by what he wrote next. June 12, 2013 “…in January of this year I decided to continue playing on my original save file, determined not to end this struggle through overwhelming force alone. I concede that at this point, armed with the knowledge that I have gained through this experience, I could if I want at any time, crush the Viking menace with relative ease. I continue the story now simply to see the narrative play itself out. Besides, keeping them around has its uses when considered from a certain perspective. Consider if you will, what need would there be for my glorious Celtic Communist state to exist in a world at peace? How would I justify to the masses the need for brutal dictatorship and big brother’s watchful eye if there is no longer an external threat to protect them from? I couldn’t. And so the external threat must be maintained of course. The parallels of my Eternal War to George Orwell’s 1984 were of course apparent, but I have since decided to fully embrace our inevitable Orwellian future. Or present, considering the headlines. Whether it’s the NSA spying on our communications, Turks being brutalized for wanting to preserve a historic park, or President Assad of Syria butchering entire cities worth of his own countrymen to remain in power, there are many lessons from life to draw upon.” “The year is 4200 AD. The world is a nightmare of suffering and devastation. This has not changed. Two more centuries of war have yielded no victor. But of course this is now by design rather than stalemate. Rather than destroy the Vikings, my largest operation of the 41st century was a massive naval and land offensive to capture the new Viking capital of Piza, with the intention of instigating a civil war among their people. The naval campaign was a disaster. Viking cruise missiles wiped out most of the fleet along with most of the troops in transport before they ever made landfall. Eventually Piza did fall, but this did not result in a civil war as I had hoped. I soon withdrew from the city which was of course recaptured shortly thereafter. And so went 40 years of planning and preparation.” “The 42nd century was dominated by an unprecedented number of uprisings and rebellions across my empire. Every other year it seemed as though fresh waves would replace the rebels I gunned down the year before. Even with my overwhelming military advantage, it became difficult to cope. The rebels would appear outside some of my most developed cities and tear up the roads and railways before I could react. With the roads gone, it became an ordeal to move troops close enough to attack them. Before I could, more rebels would appear elsewhere and thus divide my attention. This culminated in the sacking of the city Shoreside Vale. At that point for the first time ever, I had more troops engaged in quelling rebellions than fighting the Vikings. And not because they were particularly powerful; but because there were so many and so disparate, spread across all reaches of my empire. Eventually I created a squadron of fighters, not bound by roads, specifically to engage the rebels so that the rest of my production could be focused on maintaining the status quo on the front lines. This is where things stand now. My alliance with the Americans remains strong, and the Sioux remain weak. All is as it should be. I shall update you all on the situation once again before the end of the year. And remember: Big Brother is watching….” Poor Lycerius, commander of the Celts, one of the three remaining super nations left squabbling for the irradiated remains of planet Earth in the year 4200 AD. He asked for help on the reddit gaming forums to try and crowdsource an end to his Eternal War, found it, and then didn’t have anything to do, so his world stopped. He rebooted the war and now keeps it going just so his world can continue to exist.
“The world is a hellish nightmare of suffering and devastation” -Lycerius June 12, 2012